First we had each other, then we had you. Now we have everything.
For most people finding out about a pregnancy an exciting moment, something to capture in a picture or create a vlog post about. We’ve all seen those YouTube videos of teary eyed mothers-to-be showing the whole world the plastic tube they had just gracefully peed with the expectation that we would find the two lines just as magical as they did. Well, in my case, falling pregnant was one of the scariest moments in my life even though I was financially stable and traveling the world out of boredom. Being a young professional in the banking industry working specifically for an international organisation, one of my biggest concerns was falling too far behind my peers, or creating my own glass ceiling. I found myself wondering if my bosses would stop putting my name forward for short term assignments, or if I would be perceived as just another baby-maker who fell off a well defined trajectory. It is almost taboo to even consider working mothers as such, but every woman who has been in the industries dominated by males knows that this s indeed something we need to handle with care.
I only remember fragments of the night I found out that I was growing a little human inside me, the most notable being my husband Nuno’s response when I told him. Being the emotional one of the two, my concerns came out in short and dramatic comments like “my career is over”, “our lives will never be the same again” and our personal favourite, “there is a spawn growing inside me”. Looking back I know for sure that he too had his concerns, but it was his calm levelheaded nature that brought sense into me. He pointed out that we are both educated, working adults, madly in love and ready for anything. For all the men out there, I need to address this right now… You can never tell a hormonal woman something and expect her to accept it. The best method is to lead her thoughts to the right conclusion and affirm her words so that it is her decision and you are being supportive
In my situation, Nuno could have said everything I needed to hear and yet all the uneasiness would not have gone away. We were not only still getting to know each other, but the love of my life and I were living in two completely different countries with very different personal goals. I knew he meant every word of assurance but neither of us could deny the bumpy road ahead.
It took a few weeks for the idea to fully settle in, with the tadpole “spawn” evolving to the cute lemon sized “Spawny” and then the little soccer baby kicking my ribs each time I lay down for the night. I must say the beauty of being married to such a lovely soul is his ability to change something negative into a funny anecdote that we can tell our grandchildren one day. Today, we still refer to Gabby as Spawn and this name will forever remain. Spawny, our first love, is now a fundamental part of our lives which have definitely changed for the better.