7 Things to Consider Before Sharing Your Motherhood Journey Online

Written by Krisna from happymamahappybaby.ca

The other day I got asked why I decided to put myself out there by blogging about my motherhood journey when all these years I’ve been an advocate of keeping my life private and staying away from social media. I did address this question and it led me to mull over some of the things that have happened over the last few months since I started blogging. I think sharing these thoughts is important or could be helpful especially if there are moms out there who are thinking about taking the step towards sharing their experiences as well. Here are 7 things you should consider before sharing your private life for public consumption:

1. You would have to share some details of yours and your kids’s life to your audience.

You can’t talk about motherhood without talking about your kid/s; so blogging about being a mom also means that part of your kid’s privacy would have to give. To this day, I still struggle with this. There’s always that challenge of balancing what to share and how detailed should I share. But I find as I keep blogging, I get better at crafting something informative and helpful for readers, without going into too much personal details of my and my kid’s life. Before writing about something, I always ask myself “how would this affect my family” alongside “how would readers benefit from knowing this information.” These are guiding principles that help me find the right balance between publicizing personal details and writing helpful and informative posts.

2. You need to know how to properly use social media (especially the ones owned by Mark Zuckerberg)

Prior to having a blog, I wasn’t active on social media. I’ve deactivated my personal social media accounts since 2014. I only kept Twitter because I like getting news updates from it and supporting my favourite Raptors! Anyway, I digress. This is not the essence of this point, I promise!

When I started my blog, I re-joined IG and FB in hopes of introducing and promoting my blog to potential readers. Within a month of re-joining FB, my account got permanently blocked. Something about my activities on there “didn’t agree with FB’s Community Standards.” To this day, I’m still wondering what I did to annoy Mr. Zuckerberg’s FB community. 

I’m still on IG, though within the first week of me creating my account, my activities got restricted (can’t comment, can’t put captions, can’t follow accounts) because the IG algorithm considered them as bot activity. You see, I don’t know how to use social media! 

This is not much of a big deal because there are other platforms I could use to market my website. For example, I recently learned that Pinterest could be a powerful tool and I am in the process of learning the ins and outs of Pinterest so I could tap into its power.

3. You could become a magnet for MLM (multi-level marketing) gigs.

Depending on whether you’re a fan of MLM or not, you may consider this as either a blessing or a curse. 

I personally am not a fan. Two months into blogging, I received 5 different invites to join various MLM companies — two are health and nutrition, two are children’s clothing line, one is finance. I’m an easy target because I share my mom life and people think I’m highly interested in “making cash while sitting at home.” Now all the reps that reached out to me said they aren’t operating a pyramid scheme because pyramid is illegal. I won’t go into the details of their defence but I’ll note that after much research, I personally concluded they are all pyramid in disguise. 

There is nothing wrong with getting invited to join these gigs. If you’re into them, then by all means join them. But if you’re not, just know that the invites will come as soon as you start publicizing your life. My suggestion is: do your own research before joining these programs so you don’t get enticed with making the initial “investment” while expecting you will make ridiculously “high returns” without having to put much time and effort.

4. You’ll get a fair share of bashing because not everyone will agree with your thought

A month into my blog and social media accounts going live, I got my first taste of bashing because a troll account didn’t agree with my thought that George Floyd (may his soul rest in peace) calling out for his “mama” for help was heartbreaking for me to watch. I’m a new mom, of course I felt that cry! But I was told that “I am so misinformed;” “I don’t know what really is going on;” “I should go back and educate myself;” “I shouldn’t find that heartbreaking because he’s a criminal…” Thanks internet troll for telling me how I should feel!

Another mom I came to know online got bashed because she shared her story of having a hard time to latch her daughter in the first two days after giving birth; and because of that her daughter almost slipped into a coma. She was called stupid. She was told it was her fault because how on earth can she not do something so natural?! 

Another mom got bashed for gaining weight during her pregnancy. One really harsh comment she got was “your fat is suffocating the baby.” She’s an empowered woman so she handled these kinds of harsh comments like a champ. But I couldn’t believe how the internet won’t even spare a pregnant woman from mean comments!

You probably get the point I’m trying to make. The internet could be really harsh and unreasonable some times.

Now, I know what you’re thinking — why am I still blogging?

Well it really is simple and this is the part that I enjoy the most — enough to make me shrug off all of the above.

5. You get to inspire people.

In the short time that I’ve been mom blogging, I received a lot of comments like “thanks for sharing your story” or “I can relate to this” or “now I know what to really expect.” These are the comments that matter to me. They confirm that I’m doing something right and I’m able to help other mamas in my own little way. 

When you’re a new mom, you need tremendous amount of support. If I could be a virtual support because my stories are relatable to others and help moms feel better because they know they’re “not the only one” going through tough times, then I’m really content with that.

6. You get to meet new people.

Blogging opened my eyes to a world that I never knew existed. I get to read about and learn from other people’s experiences. I see so many creative minds. There are so many beautiful and heartwarming posts to be inspired by. I get to connect with other bloggers and know them through their posts and our exchange of comments and reactions to each other’s blogs. I even got to do this collaboration with one of the most inspiring bloggers I came to know online!

7. You get to do something for yourself.

It’s easy to get lost/drained in motherhood because it requires so much from you. Blogging really became an outlet for me to share my feelings, thoughts, and experiences. I really did it so I can get back to feeling like myself again. The other perks came in later. 

Now I realize how blogging allows me to sit down, take a break, and appreciate how blessed I am. It helps me clear my mind and gain new perspective about living life, creating a home, being a mom and a wife, etc.

I’m not saying every mom should start a blog. I’m just saying if you’re a new mom, struggling to find yourself because you think all you do now is momming; start thinking about your creative passion and get on it — even if it’s just a few minutes or a couple hours per week! Trust me, it will make a huge difference!

These are just some things that you may want to take into consideration before publicizing your private life. Putting yourself out there isn’t easy and it’s even harder if it involves putting your kid’s life out there for public consumption. 

I really struggled with it before I made the decision to start blogging about my motherhood journey. I kept going back and forth whether it’s a good idea or not, because as I’ve said, I’ve been a very private person long before I started my blog. 

But I wanted an outlet for my creative expression. I wanted to have my own little corner of the internet filled with my stories which I’m hoping are relatable and inspiring for other moms. And so far, I can honestly say that the “good” outweighs the “bad” tremendously.

We live in a world where we are connected digitally. If we get to learn from each other’s experiences, uplift each other through tough times, and encourage each other when faced with challenging situations, I think the digital world then becomes more of a supportive system rather than a scary place.

*****

Author bio

Hi! I’m Krisna! I’m a first-time mama and an advocate of mama self-care. I write about my motherhood experiences and some tips that I learn along the way in hopes of inspiring other new mamas to love and enjoy their journey into motherhood. Having a baby is a life-changing moment and taking care of a newborn is no easy task. When you’re a new mom, you get thrown into situations and feel emotions that you have never encountered before. For that, it helps to know that someone is going through or has been through it too; and that it is possible to overcome such situations. This is why I started blogging my motherhood journey. You can find me at http://www.happymamahappybaby.ca

28 Comments Add yours

  1. Chocoviv says:

    This is awesome! Love being a mommy blogger!!

    Like

  2. Hilary Tan says:

    Personally, I don’t talk much about motherhood on my blog. The topic itself is quite triggering for me and I struggle with jealousy. It’s petty of me but it’s a personal struggle of mine. For a while, I had to unfollow other mom bloggers if their blogs were heavily focused on motherhood but I’m starting to come around. The topic of motherhood/pregnancy is emotionally painful for me for various reasons I haven’t shared on my blog. People might think this is weird since I am a mom myself.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Shelly DS says:

      Oh gosh I had no idea! I hope I haven’t triggered you in any way, also, I’m grateful that you’ve stuck around with all my mommy posts! Hope you’re doing ok 💖

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Hilary Tan says:

        No worries at all! You didn’t trigger me at all it’s all good 💕 I feel like such an immature brat but I feel better getting it off my chest. Tbh when Krisna followed me, I had mixed feelings because I wasn’t sure how to approach her. Her blog was the type of blog I had been avoiding for months but I took the leap of faith and followed her back. I’m starting to feel like I’m making progress.

        P.S. There are things I will continue to avoid like IG and FB. Baby steps. 🙏🏻💕

        Liked by 2 people

      2. Shelly DS says:

        My hubby always says that every reaction is justified somehow. I don’t know your “why” but it’s definitely there 💖 don’t down play it~ but yeah Krisna is amazing, I absolutely love her writing!

        Like

      3. Krisna says:

        Hi Hilary! I had no idea. I’m sorry, didn’t mean to trigger anything. I hope you’re doing well! 💖

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Hilary Tan says:

        No worries, Krisna!💕 I’ve made progress since last year lol I’m doing OK – been busy (and stressed out) with school. It takes up all of my time and I’m using it as a distraction these days 🤭

        Liked by 1 person

      5. Krisna says:

        Glad to hear you’re doing ok now ☺️ and kudos to you for juggling being a mom, blogging and studying… I can only imagine how hectic it is!

        Liked by 1 person

      6. Hilary Tan says:

        Amazingly, I haven’t been to a therapist all year. I am considering it if this semester is particularly bad; there is a lot of pressure to pass. My social life is non-existent. 😅

        Like

  3. Olivia says:

    It takes so much strength and courage I think to write honestly about parenting and motherhood online. The world is filled with so many opinions on how you should be raising kids. And that means as a mommy blogger or parenting blogger you are open to so much more criticism. But none the less we need these pages, to bring an open and honest account of the struggles (and good times) of being a parent!
    I loved this post Shelly, thanks for sharing😊

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Shelly DS says:

      Thanks for reading, Liv. I wish I could take credit for this piece but Krisna is one heck of a writer and I’m glad to share her piece 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Michelle (Boomer Eco Crusader) says:

    This is fantastic. I think we all need to beware the trolls. They are everywhere. So far, my blogging experience has been mostly positive. Maybe I’m just lucky, or maybe I don’t attract those followers for some reason.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. beth says:

    I think it’s great, a win-win. good for you, and good for those you reach. showing them you don’t have to be perfect, just do what you can, with good intentions, and it will all be okay.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Shelly DS says:

      Thanks for reading Beth! I agree with you, and I believe Krisna also does too 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I sooooo needed to read this today! It’s hard to know how much to share and what’s right to put out there. Social media and being a mommy blog definitely has its positives and negatives! Thank you for this awesome breakdown! ❤️

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Shelly DS says:

      It’s all Krisna 🙂 Thanks for reading!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Krisna says:

    Shelly, thanks so much for featuring this blog! I’m so happy we got to work with each other this way 🥰

    Liked by 1 person

  8. You words ring so true! Being a mom blogger can be incredibly vulnerable, which comes with great reward but also a space to feel hurt and misunderstood. I appreciate your authenticity as a mom blogger!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Audrey says:

    #3 is so true! It’s a pet peeve of mine

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Sankhamala says:

    You are so right!!! Blogging has helped me to discover a new me, new blogger friends and a new perspective to life.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Kally says:

    Yeah, the anonymous bashing is why I stick to safer topics like career management because I can stick in up their arse since I have 20 years of experiences doing that. While as a mom, I’m still pretty new at it. There are way too many busybodies trying to be the parenting expert. I don’t need them in my life – just me and my little girl will do fine.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Shelly DS says:

      Thanks for reading and subscribing Kally 💖 I completely understand what you mean, and honestly I started off as purely a mom blogger but decided to make it more lifestyle with a splash of baby here and there for that reason! I still love reading other people’s experiences, like Krisna’s, and it does give encouragement.

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Jan says:

    Great post. It takes courage to go out share your motherhood journey. And you’re totally right. Social media is a double edged sword. But there’s so much potential to do good with it, when used well.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Shelly DS says:

      Thanks for stopping by and commenting 😊 I see you’re a fellow mom and still I. The early phases of this journey. All I can say is good luck lol ~ I’m excited to go on this journey with you!

      Liked by 1 person

  13. Saima Umair says:

    So relatable! I just started my blog one month ago and these were the exact thoughts I was getting because I also don’t like to share everything on social media and I never did! Although I am not a new mom but yes that’s exactly why I started my blog…. to do something for myself. Thank you for sharing this blog.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Shelly DS says:

      That’s exciting! Congratulations on starting your blog, I hope you’re enjoying it. Do what you feel comfortable with, you’ll go far 💖

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s