Being single can be several things – it can be a fun, freeing time to focus on your friends, your work, your hobbies, or anything else that’s yours and yours alone. It can be lonely and frustrating. Or it can be a good time to explore what you’re looking for in a long term partner. In that case, you’re gonna have to go on a first date (probably a couple of first dates, to be honest.)
And, like being single, going on a first date can be both fun and exciting and painfully nerve wracking.
But, unfortunately, it’s a necessity to finding love. So, if you’re in that boat, here are 5 tips to help your first date go smoothly.
I am so excited to have Katie from DatingB on the blog today for another guest post all about first dates! I hope you enjoy it. – Shelly
1. STAY SAFE
Alright, so this first one is really important – it might not be the sexiest or most interesting point on this list, but you absolutely need to be mindful of your safety during a first date.
If you’re going out with someone you’ve never actually met before (like, that guy you’ve been chatting with on Tinder) make sure you do some background research ahead of time. Get their full name and look them up. For one thing, a little Facebook stalking is going to give you a better sense of who they are. But for another thing, having their information makes staying safe easier.
Make sure you tell someone (a friend, a family member, a roommate) where you’re going and who you’re going out with. Give your friend your dates FULL NAME, too. It might seem weird, but if something happens, it’ll be good if someone knows the details.
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2. PICK THE RIGHT VENUE
This is basically your first impression and luckily for you, you can control it before you even meet the guy (or girl) in question!
There are plenty of fun dating ventures you can have, but for a first date, you’ll want to keep things simple.
For a day-time date, I’d recommend a local coffee shop. It’s casual and well-suited for conversation and people-watching (which can be nice when you’re meeting someone for the first time!) Plus, it’s the kind of venue where you can easily stay for a few hours if things are going well, but you could also cut and run after 30 minutes if need be.
Meeting up for a (short) outdoor hike or picnic is another good first date idea for those wanting a day-time activity. As for nighttime dates, dinner and/or drinks is always a safe bet.
Really, you want to pick something that makes you feel comfortable but that gives plenty of opportunity to actually talk and get to know the person (so, you know, not a movie.)
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3. DRESS THE PART
etting dressed for a first date might very well be the most stressful thing about the whole courtship thing (at least, it is for me!)
In an ideal world, dating would be based solely on personality and compatibility. But, let’s be realistic here. Dating (at least in the beginning) is very much based on attraction. Now, personality and compatibility certainly play a part in how attracted someone is to you, but it’s not the first thing they’re gonna notice.
No, that’d be your looks. You want to look good and for a first date, that means wearing something casual and flirty. Your makeup should be soft and subtle – this is not the time to go for that bold red lip or smokey eye! And your clothing should be equally subtle.
It’ll depend on your venue, of course, but here are some safe bets, dress wise:
- A pair of slimming jeans with a nice top or blouse
- Leggings paired with an oversized sweater or loose-fitting tunic
- A casual dress (nothing too fancy)
Later on, if things go well, you can go all out. But for a first date, you don’t need to wear anything too revealing, bold, or extravagant.
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4. COME PREPARED
There’s nothing worse than being on a first date and having literally NOTHING to talk about. You know, that date when you’ve run out of things to say before the appetizers even arrive. Yeah, I’ve been there and that sucks!
So, try and prevent that by coming prepared with some good conversation topics.
Now, this isn’t a job interview, so your talking points shouldn’t be super formal or rehearsed. But, look up a few good questions ahead of time so that if you start feeling like things aren’t going well, you’ve got a plan.
(Here are some good first date questions if you need a list)
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5. USE THE RIGHT KIND OF TOUCH
First, greet your date with a smile and a brief hug. This is warm and friendly and sets the tone for the rest of the evening.
During the actual date, you can flirt with some light and playful arm touching. And when it’s time to say goodbye, a hug is always a nice ending. Now, if you really felt a lot of chemistry, an end-of-the-night kiss is perfectly fine. But I’m going to go ahead and say you shouldn’t go much further than that.
I know, I know – it’s 2021! But it’s still a first date. You don’t know if this person is actually going to call you like they said they would. Plus, you probably also don’t know if they’ve been tested recently (see the above rule about being safe!)
So, stay non-committed and keep the first date touching to PG.
Do you have any other first date tips to add to the list?