Hey friends, today we’ll have a chat around internet friendships and what to look out for. I have never been one to befriend anyone over the internet for fear of letting a psychopath into my life who would kill me and everyone I love… It’s plausible, don’t judge! However, getting into this blogging lifestyle has challenged my views to some extent.
While I still value privacy and safety above anything else, I have also found the need to exchange ideas with like-minded individuals. In real life, most of our friendships are those made through our hobbies, in the office, on campus, etc. But what happens when your hobby is reaching out to strangers through your written art? Is it safe to have internet friendships?
How internet friendships help you as a blogger
Something that other bloggers have mentioned which I can testify too is that as much as your family and friends will be supportive of your blog, they don’t get it. You tend to get more investment and genuine feedback from those who are also in the same sphere. As these acquaintances slowly evolve into friendships, you can learn and grow more in your field through your frequent exchanges.
Blogging is also just like any other hobby in which you meet people and start to form relationships. So what is the hard line to draw when you develop stronger bonds with other bloggers?

Whats the difference?
As an introvert, my friendships might as well be internet based because I rarely like to go out. That being said, the option to meet the person does make things different. It all boils down to being able to verify if the person is real, where they live and if they are the age they claim to be. In real life, you can also bond over shared hobbies like exercise or drinks. You are also able to take pictures and really create a trail of said friendship.
With internet friendships, there are not many common activities you can do which makes the bond fall down to communication. As for verifying their details, you need to rely on your intuition. Is that enough to build a true bond?
Identity theft? Human Trafficking?
The security issues we fear from giving a ‘virtual’ someone too much information about ourselves are countless. Identity theft, fraud, kidnapping, etc are all possibilities, but what makes meeting someone any different? I never thought it would be possible to befriend someone and never get to meet their family even once… Then I went to university. I do suppose that seeing someone in person does at least give confirmation on their gender and age range. But how much can we honestly say about who they are as a person? We are living in times when it is easier to know more about the YouTube stars’ personal lives than the very people we walk, laugh and play with. Scary isn’t it?
Internet friendships or real life, which is better?
With real life friendships – you know, the kind that you can touch, stalk and see the person – is the tangibility of the person reason enough to believe that they are truthful? Should there be a different standard applied to the friends you have seen at least once?
In my view, trust is definitely something that needs to be earned. But like everything else, there are definitely some things that never really need to be shared, regardless. My rule of thumb is that if I tell someone something private and they let it slip, it is my fault for confiding in the first place. Of course that speaks heaps about my issues with trust and forgiveness. However, this view has been close to three decades in the making! So when it boils down to it, I personally have no issues with either type of frienship.
What are your views?
Do you have any online friendships that have blossomed into a true bond? How do you stay safe when making friends online? Do you find it easier opening up to someone you can’t see?
Love this!
Thanks for reading 😘
Before blogging I wouldn’t have ever said I had internet friendships. I probably did more so when I was younger and then grew out of it when myspace and bebo ceased to exist. The blogging friendships I have now are really special to me. I wouldn’t even label some of them ‘blogging friends’ just friends 🤗 Sometimes it can be easier to speak to people you don’t really know about personal things. Which sounds weird. But they don’t have this preconceived idea of you, they wont judge you. Sometimes its nice to speak with someone who isn’t directly in your inner circle
Lol MySpace? Goodness I had forgotten about that thing! I completely understand about having new friends that have no idea of your past or know people who would’ve spread rumores about you. It is definitely a clean slate to rewrite your own story 😊
The internet friends who become real life friends are the best ones! I have 2 friends who live in other countries who I met online before meeting in real life. I already knew I liked these people before I met them because we met due to our common interests online. Meeting them and finding out that they are who they say they are certainly builds a lot of trust as well 🙂
I have made a lot of internet friends through my blog. And some of them have become family even though we have never met. We talk/text every day. I tell them things that my friends here don’t know. It is easier to be really open for if they don’t like the actual total me (and for most part if reading my blog I don’t really hide too much) they or I do not need to respond to or continue the relationship. Although I am working at being an adult and dealing with issues as the arise instead of allowing them to fester and ferment. I love the family that I am putting together the one that I am choosing because I can talk and rely on them more so then some real life friends. 🙂 Have a good day. It is my day off so am trying to get rid of shoulder pain. And relaxing. Reading. 🙂
Oh shame feel better! What were you lugging around that hurt your shoulder?
Also, it’s interesting you say that because that’s the general vibe I’m getting too – a certain hesitation to be too open with those who are in close proximity. I wonder why though!
There are just some things beneath the mask that no one admits to those closest to them lol
I believe internet friendships involve a process. Like you can’t just into a persons life and start requesting for some personal info or perspective. That’s when it gets creepy.
Internet friendships should be nestled. From maybe commenting on each other’s blogs to following on social media and then chatting about life, personal things and societal issues.
Yep! That’s more organic.
In fact, I’ve had some people who invited me for stuff just based off the internet. There’s great potentials when done properly or maturely.
Oh heck yeah! I would literally erase my online presence if someone started asking me for personal info right after saying hello 😂
You’re quite the social butterfly hey!
I completely agree that it’s creepy especially when people approach me with bad taste. I’ve blocked people before for disrespecting my wishes and crossing boundaries. It’s OK to be picky about who you allow into your life. I have a three strike rule – three strikes of disrespect/flirtatious advances and you’re out!
That’s 3 too many! 😂 First impressions are the devil with me… you gotta get it right from the get go or we will never cross paths again 🙈
I try to see the best in these people too… maybe they are so oblivious or socially awkward that they don’t know any better. If nobody gives them a chance to learn respect, how will they ever learn? Any flirtatious advancement gets them a strike. I think 3 strikes is fair. I’m very direct and give them warnings prior to blocking. It’s not like they didn’t see it coming. 😏
Lol you’re definitely more mature than I am! I’m taking notes~ it might be time to try a new approach 😅
I still feel like a kid most of the time. My EQ (emotional intelligence) sucks tbh. I’m content being married and have zero desire to establish any kind of flirtatious bond with other guys, both online and offline. The more I show disinterest, the more annoying they seem to be 🙄
It’s like they see it as a challenge, which it is not. It’s not up for debate. They can be respectful or they can leave. If I cut them off too quickly I end up feeling bad, but if I give them chances I know the decision to block or delete their numbers IS the right choice. Only one guy I kept around because he actually listened to me and realized I was being serious about blocking after the first two warnings. He’s still hella annoying and calls me out the blue so I often mute him.
😁
Good one, Shelly! I meet some pretty cool people online. I don’t thing I’ve ventured to meeting any though. I have though, reconnected with people that were acquaintances in real life and then those morphed into friendships. One one those people I saw around but spoke to only on the internet was my husband! Heh! 😹
Lol your husband you say? Hmmmm what is with people finding love online? I’m definitely from a different era 😅
😂
I think online friendships and in-person friendships have some aspects in common and some differences. There are pros and cons to both. I never thought I would make friends when I started blogging but once I started interacting with people and learning about them that changed a little. Every friendship is different so an online friendship may look different then an in-person friendship but there are still benefits in having them. I like the people I have found through blogging and I’m not quite sure how I would define those relationships yet, but making a friend seems very plausible.
Thanks for sharing, Suzanne 😊 Have you ever met your blogging friends in real life? And if not, would you be willing to?
You’re right about the similarities and differences. I think what scares me most is the unknown!
I haven’t. I guess I’m not completely opposed to the idea of meeting someone in real life. I like meeting new people and I can find something in common with pretty much anyone. But I keep a very small circle of friends and I tend not to get very close. So, I guess my answer is yes but I wouldn’t meet just anybody I would be selective. 🙂
Half of my friendship group is made up of people I met online. I’ve since met all of my online friends in person as well. In fact, one of my current flatmates is someone I met on Twitter about 7 years ago! We met a couple of years ago to watch a theatre show. Last year we both needed a place to live in London and now we’re flat sharing. I personally find it so much easier discovering people who have similar interests as me in the online world.
It’s also helped me make friends in other countries too. I have quite the little friendship group in both Belgium and the US. When I did a study abroad programme in the US a few years ago, it was nice to already have a small little support network over there giving me advice.
But like any friendships, these are friendships that have built up over time before I ever considered meeting them in person. And if you do choose to meet someone in person then you must do it safely. Meet in a public place, tell friends and family where you will be and who you are meeting with. But there’s no reason why you can’t become a close friend of someone who you met online.
Thanks for sharing Kate 😊
It’s amazing that you’ve had such positive outcomes from your Internet friendships. What country are you based in? I wonder if that also has an influence because here in South Africa, you can NOT just meet people online. Most of my online friendships are overseas
I’m based in the UK so Belgium being very close by definitely helped. But you can still grow strong bonds with people online even without meeting them. I always think online friendships are very valid. It can sometimes be the best way to meet like-minded people! I think it’s amazing you’ve made some wonderful friendships with people all over the world. The internet can be a wonderful thing 🙂
I had online friends when I was 20 and kept 2 of them over the years. One I met in person 8 years later (3 times). Her 5 year old niece and my 4 year old daughter are best friends.
I tried online dating at 20 and it was a LDR. Never did I ever think I would eventually meet him after many years of him not talking to me. I met him earlier this year and he was nothing like I expected. If you took two people and watch them diverge into 2 different directions, that’s basically what happened over time. He made no progress where I did. A huge contrast, really. But at least we got closure.
I met my husband online on OKCupid and it was the best decision I ever made. All because my mom grounded me so I resorted to local online dating sites. I’ve been with him since January 2013 🙂
Lol you have the most interesting stories Hilary! You were grounded so you went on a dating site? 😂 You make me nervous to raise a kid!
You definitely seem like a very open person when it comes to online convos, so I’m not surprised you have spun it in such a positive way 😊
Great Post Shelly! I too fall into the camp of “are they crazy chatting online”. I mean I have busy life with work etc and yet i have found myself truly blessed to have created some really lovely friendships here which is totally surprising. By the way, I LOVE your font and colors you are using. Do you mind sharing? Headings, colors etc. Maybe a blog post on it?
Have a great day! ❤️
I think internet friendships are very real. I have a lot of contacts that I have never met in person. I agree that we need to be cautious, but meeting people in person really isn’t a guarantee of safety.
Interestingly, my daughter has a documentary film coming out on Friday about how the friendships she has made on her Twitch stream have helped her cope with the pandemic. I can’t wait to see it. You can check it out here: http://bftvsites.sheridanc.on.ca/alonetogether/
Oh wow that’s pretty cool! I’ll be waiting for it to come out 😊 what time will it be viewable? Also what does your daughter do?
It will be on live stream on Twitch Friday night at 7:30 Eastern Standard Time. Eventually it will be online on the website or on YouTube.
She’s a film student in her third year of a film degree. This is a school project but it’s something she’s really excited and passionate about.
I still have this sense of wanting to keep my life private from my blog because like you said, safety is number one. But I will say the best part of blogging (especially this year being so isolated from my friends and family a lot of the time) is interacting with like minded individuals who understand the blogging journey far more than anyone in my “real” life so to speak. I seriously feel like I am making friends within this community even though we may never meet. I’m glad I feel understood by so many people. And I’m thankful for everyone I’ve met so far, including you! 🙂
Aww thanks hun, that means a lot to me! I feel the same way about you! And I totally get you – the people we interact with physically just don’t get it 😅 I’ve been asked why I write so much and what the point is 😂
Oh my gosh 😂😂😂 some people just don’t get it
I really enjoyed this post. I think that as bloggers we need to have a good mix of virtual friends and in person friends.
Your concerns are valid. I suppose we must trust our instincts and use our discretion on what we do over the internet. Like anything, if we are mindful, we should be okay. Of course, I am just really happy to have connected with you online. You are one of my loveliest blog friends that I hope to meet one day.
Awww thank you! We’ll meet very soon 😉 You’re absolutely right, be very mindful of what you do online!
Loved reading this post! I don’t think I had friends online before blogging. But I’ve made so many friends here (including you) and I share a special fun bond with them.
That’s awesome 😊 there are some really awesome people here, aren’t there?
Thanks so much for reading hun!
Yup! My pleasure 🌺🌺
I did met a friend online many years ago and we both became besr friends… we now talk sometimes we had a misunderstanding. But back then we met through myspace or MSN…
You are definitely a millennial if you met people on MSN or Myspace! I won’t even asl if you are keen on getting to know more people online because, duh! We are doing just that!
Agreed!
I never really had online friendships before I started blogging for the exact reasons you listed in this post. But I have been more open to them through the blogging community. I am more cautious with Instagram and Facebook unless I have already established a connection with them through wordpress. On the positive side to this I am SO HAPPY that you and I have formed an internet friendship! I feel like we’re two peas in a pod 😀
100000000% yes! I am too! I wish I could meet you in real life though. I’m sure we’d have a blast 😊 Zoom date soon?
Yes!!! 💯 Zoon date would be awesome!!! 😀🤗
You said it best. You have to rely on intuition. With that said I’ve met some really awesome people on the internet. I’m an introvert can be extroverted when needs be. Being a homebody it was easy for me to browse the internet joined platforms like Facebook when it was the IT place to be. My sons Godmother is someone I’ve met on Facebook. That’s a deep level of trust right there. We have an amazing bod and its just so easy to talk to her.Thanks for sharing Shelly.
That’s definitely a deep level of trust! I’m glad the net helped you find someone so dear to you that you wouldn’t have met otherwise 😊
Thanks for reading ~ and here’s to being introverted selective extroverts! 🥂
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