Recently, I shared some of my goals for 2022 and one of them was to start a YouTube channel. Considering that the only creative bone I have in my body is the bone, this comes as a bit of a shock to everyone I know. Heck, it even came as a shock to me! But alas, nothing in my life ever tends to make sense, so I will receive the channel with open arms.
So we are now in January 2022, and it’s time to make that goal a reality… But all I feel is dread. Maybe a tinge of excitement, but mostly cold, nerve-wracking dread.
Not being good enough
The best YouTube channels all have something special about them. And no, I’m not just talking about the personality of the hosts. It’s the transitions, the intros with the B-roll (something I’ve just learnt today), the sound effects…
When I think about my favourite YouTubers, the list does not consist of a plain Jane with zero personality or filmography skills… And yet, that is exactly who I will be. Well, minus the zero personality, of course.
So what if I’m not good enough? What if my YouTube Channel never gets any views? And what if after two years, I still don’t get the tricks of the trade?
The trolls
One thing is me feeling inadequate, another is someone telling me that I am.
Growing up in Japan, I was taught that we need to humble ourselves all the time. Someone tells you that you speak well, tell them you don’t. Someone tells you that you are so clever, deny it…
The only difference between a typical Japanese girl and me is that I internalized those words I was trained to say.
Pair the lack of confidence with a troll, and I am worried about what it will do to me. Of course, I could disable comments and all of that jazz, but part of the joys of being on social media platforms just like this one is interacting with people who genuinely have something to say.
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Having a YouTube channel on top of everything else
Hello, my name is Michelle and I am exhausted. Mom, wife, full-time employee, and a blogger – something’s gonna give it I add a YouTube channel to the plate!
I’ve written posts on how I manage juggle some of my responsibilities, but the honest truth is that some days it gets overwhelming. There are days when I snap at my toddler or completely ignore my spouse. There are times when I go to work and just highlight blank cells on excel. Heck, I’m also well-known for doodling in meetings!
All of this to say that my concern is more so for my mental health than actually having more to do. I’m sure I’ll find a way to manage, but at what expense?
Related: How to juggle blogging and a full-time job
Failing
When I started my blog, I was okay with the idea of no one ever reading my work. It also didn’t matter if people liked what I was writing because no one really knew me. Plus, I was writing under a Pseudo name…
YouTube is different.
While I can still keep some anonymity with regards to my real name, my location, and what I actually do, my face will be on the channel.
Similar to Mindy from Emily in Paris, would I have to move to another continent to get away from the disaster should it come to pass? And if I try to delete any videos, what’s to guarantee that someone wouldn’t have copied it and made a meme out of me?
On a personal level, this is all quite manageable, but what about if this affects my career?
But what if it thrives?
Believe it or not, I am also afraid that this YouTube channel will thrive. I’ve been asked a few times before if I would like to become a CEO or to win a million dollars and my worry is what I will become if any of these scenarios were to be realised.
Regardless, I will trudge on with my plans of creating a Youtube channel, because, without growth, we are nothing. And I hope that you will challenge yourself to do something out of your comfort zone too!
For anyone wondering, here’s the very first video on my channel. YOLO!
If you have a YouTube Channel, what are some things that you feared most before going live?
Pssst! Let’s hang on the socials!
looking forward to your new adventure – nothing ventured, nothing gained
Thank you Beth ☺️ fingers crossed all goes well!
You’re very brave. I’m not sure I could ever do a YouTube channel.
Thanks Mich! 😅 Life is too short to have regrets… hmmm maybe that should be the phrase of the year.
How i relate to each and every fears of yours…
Like i was blatantly nodding to your every point as if i am talking to myself….
Hey… i just wanna say…you have already took your first step… and from here there are only two possibility either you will learn running or you will fail…just dive into it…. and wait for results. ❤ 💙
Your blogging fam is with you always…
And for tbe trolls.. keep simba on the background…everyone will be in check 😉 😜
Aww this is cute! You are so supportive Vani, thanks so much ☺️ Thanks for always pushing me and Simba to get things done!
oh, michelle, i can completely empathize with all of this. beginning any new venture — especially one that you hope will succeed — is so full of self-doubt and what ifs. with me, it’s writing. and i sat down and thought through some scenarios, which kind of helped me visualize how i’d react. and one of them, certainly, was, what if i spend all this time doing this thing and it doesn’t work out? for me, that was the hardest to face. but after i really investigated my feelings about that particular scenario, i realized that it would be worthwhile anyway, and i try to remind myself of that when i’m feeling low. the work itself is worthwhile, even if the outcome isn’t what i hope for. i am rooting so hard for you, as i’m sure MANY people are. you’ve got this!!!
Gosh Suzanne, reading your work I would never have guessed that you had doubts about writing! I’m so glad you stuck with it, and hope you continue. I’ll definitely be trying your approach and analyzing each scenario for my sanity. Sometimes we are our biggest obstacles and it really shouldn’t be that way!
Thanks so much for all the love and support, it truly means the world to me 💖
Go for it, Shelly! I give the same advice to anyone trying something new. I think most people are like me and admire anyone who has the courage to try new things. It isn’t about the particular pursuit; it’s about having the heart and willingness to overcome that fear that makes it all the more admirable. When I was younger, I avoided putting myself out there, but I’ve come to learn that I feel best about myself when I do. We also take inspiration and feed off the energy of others going through similar challenges.
Let’s say you give this a go, and it doesn’t turn into a big moneymaking success. Does that make you a failure? Not in my book. It makes you someone to be admired for going after your goals. Good luck! By the way, you come across (I’m betting this is your natural persona) as a likable and friendly person.
Pete, you are so encouraging! Thanks so much for this push. And you are right, character comes in doing… I’d hate to look back on this moment ten years from now and wonder what could’ve been! If it fails, like you said, at least I tried! ☺️
Haha yeah, that was just me being me in the video 🙈
YAYYYY Shelly.. you did it.. congrats.. I don’t have an intro page … but then i just use it for my blog.. have fun xo💖💖👏
Haha yeah it was now or never 😅
I just found you and subbed 😊 Looking forward to learning from you!
you done good girl!!! 👏👏👏
Oh I should pay attention to it more maybe? ol 💖💖💖
Yes please do! And please subscribe ☺️
DONE👏👏👏👏👏
Shelly! It’s so nice to see your smiling face 😁. I started a Youtube account too but haven’t done anything with it yet 😅
Haha thanks Ang, please subscribe!
And please do something more with your channel, I’d love to watch your videos! What’s the channel called?
It’s just called Lose Weight with Ang. I’ll subscribe when I get off work 🙂
It’s very cool to see your face and hear your voice! Come to think of it, I wouldn’t mind seeing YouTube videos from other bloggers too. It adds another personal dimension. And I agree, it is so exciting and fun to stretch yourself. One of the things that makes life worth living.
Yay thanks hun! Please subscribe 😊
Trolls! They’re wretched. I think it’s interesting that you put you’re scared of success as well. I think a lot of us truly crave success and winning but our society makes us fear it
OMG I can’t wait to watch! I hope you keep at it! It’s not my dream but secretly my dream but not my dream! ACk I don’t know but I always watch YouTubers and think, that looks like such an amazing career choice! Of course, there’s the multi-tasking and pressure and stress of it all but overall, it looks thrilling! Can’t wait to watch! 😀
Hahaha you are literally me in another body! I was kinda iffy about it but have also been dying to do it for so long… it’s about time!
Thanks for supporting! Please subscribe if you wanna keep an eye on the videos 😊
Good luck with your new journey!!!! 🙂 Subscribed and looking forward to your videos!
I have thought SO many times of having a travel YouTube channel but I am SO SO awkward which is why blogging works perfectly for me 😀
this is relatable. I’ve considered starting a youtube channel too and have had many of the same fears. One big fear is that people won’t like my content. After all there are so much content on youtube and so the competition is pretty fierce. It’s just like blogging. but I believe that if you are authentic and have stellar video editing skills while being relatable then the audience will come.
Gosh Helen, I would love to watch your videos, especially since it’ll add so much depth to the version of you I’ve grown to love on WP 😊 If you ever do start one, let me know and I’ll be your first sub!
Ha! Similar to you, I created a blog regardless of if anyone would ever read it, but I wanted eyes on my YouTube channel because vlogging takes so much work. Therefore, my fear was that no one would ever watch or subscribe especially since I was using my outdated S9 to film so I knew the quality wasn’t as top tier as professional YouTubers who invest in their craft. Nonetheless, I’ve now posted 10 or so videos and have 380+ subscribers! I’ve found YouTube too much work though, so the channel is currently dormant.
Oh wow you’re on YouTube?! Don’t tell me that it’s too much work 😭 I just started my channel and am editing my first real video!! Can I have some tips?
I feared one thing: Not being able to consistently come up with ideas for the channel to thrive.
It’s easy to start a channel, but it very difficult to continue a channel that is hard to create content around the specific niche that you pick.
But that’s my suggestion, to anyone who is interested in starting their own channel, is to think, deeply, about your niche, and the rest of your fears will not have room to even linger in your mind. Because if you can be consistent, and move forward with a niche that you enjoy and can create constant content around, you are going to grow your channel, in a very organic way.
Thanks hun, this is valuable advice! So far, I’m choosing the young working adult with a passion project idea as my target viewer~ since I’m in that predicament right now just like my friends are, it seems like the most natural audience to speak to 😊
Well, you sound like you have a plan! I believe that when you are passionate about something, the ideas are endless.
If I have to zoom in 15x to read your post, you can bet either my eyesight is f**d up, or your website is bad. P.S. I just had eye laser surgery.